What really happens - an investigation

[Qasim]

Alright, I think all of us know that Desp-fiction nearly always assumes a rather weak bladder on the side of the female protagonist. And boy, do I wish it was similar in real life.
However, I was somewhat brought back to reality in this respect when my girlfriend told me about her worst experience with having to hold it. Apparently, she and her family were on their way on vacation to an island off the German coast, which can only be reached via a car train. Now, when they got to the station, she already had to pee, but as the train was already waiting, did not get to do it.
The situation got worse and worse as they were on the train, until the point where she got somewhat dizzy. The way she tells it, when they arrived at the hotel, she was already fainting from the stress of holding it in and had to be kind of carried upstairs to the toilet.
Her analysis of the situation: "I would probably only have pissed myself if I had fainted completely, I just didn't want to go through my pants in public."

Now, from the situation above, I can only assume a bit of a discrepancy between fact and fiction, and of course, that's no surprise. Still, I would be interested to know from those who are more informed: Is it even possible to wet yourself by accident? Does everyone have this kind of stamina, or is it an [part of me says unfortunate] talent she has?

Any constructive input or experiences are welcome!

[oramisho]

To be honest, I have never been able to hold it to the point where i "accidently" lose control, and start wetting involuntarily so I'm not sure. I think for a lot of people, they just get to the point where its too painful to hold in, and just give in.  I am genuinely curious, however if true accidents are caused by a moment of weakness in holding it causing it all to break loose, or if the body just finally just takes too much pain and pressure, and your bladder just goes numb causing all loss of control.

I will however, attempt to aid in researching this by drinking a lot of water and holding it as long as I  can tonight.

[tenck5k]

It IS possible for one of those fictional accidents to occur. It depends on how fast the drinks causing the accident were consumed. Drinking lots of water over a shorter period of time will cause you to be very desperate very quickly, and it becomes painful, leading to most people to let it go to avoid the pain. Drinking small amounts over a long period of time, such as an entire day, will cause a person to SLOWLY become more desperate. The muscles controlling the bladder need to be active for a long period of time, so they weaken slowly, leading to people not being able to hold it anymore.

I'm not going to lie, I've actually tried this. I like the desperation feeling, and I wanted to know what it would feel like to slowly not be able to hold anymore, but whenever I tried I would instead feel slight pain. It got to the point where I would go to the bathroom since I was afraid I would hurt my bladder or something. During those attempts, I had been drinking water at a relatively fast rate (don't remember exactly, but it probably amounted to a bottle of water every...hour? hour and a half? not sure really).

I can't remember where I read the info in the first paragraph, but when I did I tried just drinking normally throughout the day, and simply not using the bathroom when I woke up, or for the whole day. By the time the evening rolled around I was feeling it, and as it got later, it got worse until I eventually had to run to the bathroom because the muscles down there were simply releasing.

Sorry for the wall of text...

tl:dr version: more liquid, shorter time period = pain desperation, less liquid, spread out all day = slow loss of control due to muscles tiring out.

I'm not sure, but I think holding an entire day while drinking normally, including soda, probably means I have a decently strong bladder. I'd certainly not describe my bladder as weak in any case.

EDIT: It really doesn't look as long after you post it...also added the last bit right above this edit but below the tl:dr.

[EnragedFilia]

For one thing, I think it should go without saying that a story (being a story) will usually require at least a little suspension of disbelief. That being said, google will readily verify that female urinary incontinence is a very real issue. For instance, I have seen ostensibly firsthand accounts of women who suddenly and unexpectedly experience a brief loss of control when they cough, sneeze, or laugh. As this scenario of an accident without desperation is fairly rare among our variety of fiction, I think it's safe to say that such accounts are at least largely believable. And therefore, I find it likewise believable that, given the rather extreme desperation which we writers routinely force our fictional characters to go through, the inevitable and scripted outcomes that we enjoy are by no means unrealistic.

Consider, if you will, the situation described in this blog post
http://mymsminds.blogspot.com/2006/01/stress-incontinence-or-how-to-sneeze.html

Now imagine what might occur if the author of that blog were to take a long train ride and find herself in a situation similar to that of the OP's girlfriend. Clearly, such a scenario would immediately present numerous possibilities to the minds of the writers who frequent this board. And moreover, given the condition of the lady in question, any number of them would be highly plausible.

Perhaps she's sitting quietly in the train car when someone nearby tells an unexpected joke... or perhaps she's walking briskly to try to take her mind off the situation when the train lurches and she falls to the ground... or perhaps she resolutely holds out for the entire ride, her desperation growing worse and worse, only to reach the destination and immediately try to lift a heavy suitcase... or perhaps she reaches the hotel at long last and makes a mad dash for her long-awaited bathroom salvation, only to slip on a puddle of spilled coffee (suitably ironic, if an extra cup of coffee that morning contributed to the day's events) and go sprawling face-first on the floor of the crowded hotel lobby.

As you can probably tell, each of the above scenarios was highly enjoyable to write (although the last one is rather too humiliating for my tastes... I usually prefer to allow an unfortunately lady to get away with her inevitable accident by one means or another). And as I said above, all of them are no more than moderately implausible, and then only in the particulars of the coincidences involved.

[oramisho]

tl:dr version: more liquid, shorter time period = pain desperation, less liquid, spread out all day = slow loss of control due to muscles tiring out.

I'm not sure, but I think holding an entire day while drinking normally, including soda, probably means I have a decently strong bladder. I'd certainly not describe my bladder as weak in any case.

EDIT: It really doesn't look as long after you post it...also added the last bit right above this edit but below the tl:dr.

well tonight, i can confirm for sure that drinking a ton of liquids to get desperate is very painful, and that I'm still a wuss with bladder pain tolerance. The thought never occurred to me that the bladder muscles wear out from lengh of time more then the amount of pee its holding back (i feel especially stupid now that i remember a few times where i almost felt it come out simply because i held it that long)

Well, since i have nowhere to go Wednesday , ill try drinking as little as possible that day (only when im really thirsty) and see  what happens.

[tenck5k]

It's hard to say how much to drink really since it' different for different people. I guess the best you can do is try, and adjust the amount based on the results. However, too much is probably better than too little, since not drinking enough water throughout the day could be bad for you, especially on really hot days/in really hot areas.

[Dynamic]

The human body is pretty hard to figure out.  I mean, we are greatly affected by what we eat/drink/do.  I think this is especially true for us desp fans.

As for whether or not it's possible to have a real loss of control, well, I think it's possible.  But maybe not under every circumstances.  People are all different, and as such have varying levels of endurance.  Some people can hold out forever, while others, well, can't.  Case in point, I have an awesome bladder that is practically bulletproof, but I once dated a girl who's endurance was almost nonexistent.  I watched her have many an accident right before me.

So, I think there is a combination of the two things.  For instance, while I have an awesome bladder, depending on what I put in me, it can be reduced to... not so awesome.  See the self-desperation threat in random fetishes for more info on that.  The other aspect is a person's endurance.  A person's ability to hold is governed by mindset primarily, but there is a point where the muscles themselves fail.  If you have ever done intense physical training (IE military) then you know that a muscle can just stop working when overtaxed.  This can be mitigated with training, and as the muscle gets stronger and stronger, its endurance increases exponentially.  In fact, the irony here is that for those of us who want to have an accident by holding too long, we are actually increasing our endurance.  Self desperation fans likely have the strongest bladders of all, since we regularly work them out.

Now, it's possible to decrease endurance by not holding as much.  People who frequently go to the bathroom instead of opting to hold it will have lower endurance.  It's just a matter of how strong those muscles are.

[oramisho]

Now, it's possible to decrease endurance by not holding as much.  People who frequently go to the bathroom instead of opting to hold it will have lower endurance.  It's just a matter of how strong those muscles are.

This is me in a nutshell.  A few times I've had some close encounters, and despite enjoying self wetting, the thought of public humilation terrifies me. So before classes i started going before each class, then started going before leaving the house, then when heading home, pretty much anytime imight not be near a restroom, i immediately head to one beforehand, sometimes mulitple times.

Of course, going often leaves me with a weak bladder. Which of course makes  me go more frequently instead of risking holding it in, which makes it weaker...


I think this is starting to become a problem for me.  I  Had an hour before class, and decided to eat lunch. I got a small bottle of diet doctor pepper with my meal and gulped it down and that was just about the only drink i had that morning.  Being the paranoid person i was I went to use the bathroom after eating, then half an hour later, right before i started heading to the classroom. Turns out the paranoia is justified, as that single bottle of soda went right through me and not a half hour into the 2 hour class I was already squirming in my seat. I was so relieved (pun not intended) when we got to the mid way break and i could head to the restroom.

So yeah, using the bathroom often (like ive done since middle school) will lead to a small bladder where even chugging a single bottle of soda or gatorade will give you some fast and painful desperation(having a desperation fetish makes it really hard not to think about having to pee and ignore the pain).  It doesn't make it harder to hold in pee however, just how quick i start to get desperate ( i can still hold for a pretty good while once desperate;it just hurts so much that i can never hold it to the point of actually having an accident)

[tenck5k]

I'm sure the fact that it was soda you drank doesn't help. I'm not sure about the carbonation, but I know the caffeine in Dr. Pepper is a diuretic (makes body absorb less water) so that will always make you need to go sooner.

[oramisho]

Yeah i know that,caffine is a pretty well known diuretic but even then, one single bottle normally has me looking for bathrooms in under an hour. 2 and ill most likely wet myself before the hour is up.

[tenck5k]

Guess you need to strengthen that muscle then :P

Meanwhile, the investigation continues! I'm really into this investigation, probably for the desperation >_>;
Anyway, I did another test today actually. What follows here is a likely inaccurate liquid consumption estimate. I wasn't paying much attention to it at the time. If you aren't interested in the play-by-play, head to the bottom of the post where I put a summary. First word is bold and in red, hard to miss.

I wasn't really paying attention so amounts are estimated really. I'll have to measure at some point how much the medium-sized cups in my house hold...
Woke up really late today, 11:00 or so. I actually did use the bathroom when I woke up, but I didn't go throughout the day. Had maybe 2 cups of water then, not sure since it was actually a smaller cup refilled a few times. Went to lunch maybe 12:30, had a Hawaiian Punch (20oz bottle, only exact measurement lol). Between then and and dinner (6:30?) I had 2-3 cups of water. At dinner, 1 cup. Between dinner and 1am, 2-3 cups? Last cup or so was pretty close to the end, so I doubt it got through my system to count. Did I mention I drink a lot of water? I get thirsty a lot >_>

As the evening wore on it was pretty hard to force myself to stand still. I decided sitting would be cheating, so I mostly stood when the desperation got bad. By 1:00 I was pretty sure I was starting to lose it, and at about 1:15 I had to run to the bathroom when I literally could not hold it any longer and had started to go. I picked a room close to a bathroom with no rugs or carpets, so damage was contained.

Anyway, I doubt most of you want to read about some other guy's experiences since it IS animeGIRLdesp.org, so I'll get right on to the result summary:

There was no real pain involved, and at the decisive moment I actually lost control, as in my muscles down there got tired and simply stopped holding. It was not a conscious choice to release, it was involuntary. It did take a long time though, about 8 cups of water and a 20oz fruit punch over about 13 hours.

Weakness of this experiment: I finished the hold at home. Perhaps being in a public place or with people I know instead of alone in close proximity to a bathroom would have affected the results due to mind over matter? I didn't have embarrassment and/or social suicide on the line after all. Not sure of this though since it really did feel like the muscle was at its limit.

...you know, I'm not sure why I bothered with the play-by-play in the first place, but I spent too long typing it to delete it now

Thoughts? That is, if any of you are still alive and still interested after that Wall of Text crit you for over nine thousand damage.

EDIT: Added experiment weakness.

[oramisho]

Hey , some of us are bi and interested.

I guess tomorrow ill take my turn. I will most likely drink a lot less then you did, and wil most likely break sooner. I might have to wait until nightfall to start seeing how long i can wait..

to be honest, i havent had much to drink the past few hours and havent gone in ages, it feels like it would be pretty easy to pee right about now..

[tenck5k]

Hey , some of us are bi and interested.

Valid.

I guess tomorrow ill take my turn. I will most likely drink a lot less then you did, and wil most likely break sooner. I might have to wait until nightfall to start seeing how long i can wait..

I've never really had a frame of reference, so I have no idea if my capacity is that fantastic. I just was never the person who needed to pull over for a bathroom on trips, etc. so I figured I was at least above average. Or maybe I live/hang out with lots of below average people.

In case you're wondering, no, I have not seen any of those below average people have any form of accident. I've never seen a real accident (save Kindergarten, but that doesn't count).

to be honest, i havent had much to drink the past few hours and havent gone in ages, it feels like it would be pretty easy to pee right about now..

If you're going to be up anyway, it may be fine. Instead of throwing back some more water, drink MAYBE 1 glass and just wait it out, see what happens? Not sure really.