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Title: Here's a new fic I wrote
Post by: FallenStar on March 05, 2009, 04:49:26 PM

No summary because

A) I can't think of one

AND

B) I'd rather you guys just read and find out :lol:

Title: Re: Here's a new fic I wrote
Post by: Serika on March 06, 2009, 10:52:33 AM

Just now finished reading. Good idea for a sex game, and made better by the desperation. Her thoughts/point of view was well done.

Loved what happened with her mom at the end. :lol:

Title: Re: Here's a new fic I wrote
Post by: iltslgp on March 21, 2009, 08:04:19 AM

thats pretty good dude

Title: Re: Here's a new fic I wrote
Post by: Shinryuji Naga on July 28, 2009, 02:19:11 AM

Love it.
It's... tricky! C:

Title: Re: Here's a new fic I wrote
Post by: DubiousCharms on July 28, 2009, 10:55:20 PM

Great stuff, Star! Your description of teasing was just that - arousing and frustrating (but in a good way!). Reminds me of how much I love being teased. Usually "free" peeing does nothing for me, but the way you described it was fantastic. I bet Aeri being stimulated while she peed was what did it for me - it's something I'd love to experience. The idea for the story is also pretty original. Mind if I steal that game for future use with my hubby?

Quick thing, just so you know, there's a typo in the fourth paragraph. Where you probably wanted to type "knee" you typed "need". It might take some people out of the story, not that it bothered me so much.

Title: Re: Here's a new fic I wrote
Post by: AliasnameTO on July 28, 2009, 11:41:52 PM

Gotta say, I didn't even make it halfway through. :blushing:

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Creative Writing => Fiction => Topic started by: FallenStar on March 05, 2009, 04:49:26 PM